Kids and sports......how do we choose

In our house the chosen sport is softball...... and it is that time of year....... the nerve wrecking process of finding the perfect team to play with for the upcoming season.  The choices are pretty much unlimited.  Travel ball, rec ball, team close to home, team far away, team with friends, stay in age bracket, play up an age level or even two, play on a pay to play team, play on a good team and fight for play time, or simply play it safe and play where you know what is expected.  One would think that the process would be relatively simple...... what happened to just playing with the kids in your neighborhood?  It all seems to have become so complicated.

Finding the balance, seems to be the challenge.  In our house it seems as though there are two basic types of teams. The really good teams where they work really hard and dedicate a lot of time to the sport with little time for exploring other sports...... the parents wear all the gear, the cars are all dressed for ball every other weekend, and the kids have been playing together for years.  Breaking in to these groups can be tough, especially if you are a fairly new player with raw talent.  The average teams tend to have a pretty high turn over of players...there seems to always be a key player or two missing which usually leaves a gap... the coaches are most generally dads who dedicate a ton of time which we are all so thankful for, but with the dads usually comes favorites.  There tends to be a bit of drama on these teams, but the personalities can be fun.  Which team is the right fit, and which team can help your child rise to their capabilities?

What do you do with a kid who has a lot of raw talent, but not the years of play time?  Under the right coaching, they could move from good to amazing.  Where do you find the right team, and when do you know that you have found it.  We all think our own children are amazing and they all are in their own way.  How far do we push them?

Tonight I drove my child and another to an open practice.... when I picked the girl up her dad said give 110%, almost the exact same thing I had said on our ride over.  Our conversation included, make good throws, when you feel you've pushed hard, push a little harder, and always give 110%.  One would have thought that her career hinged on this very practice.... it really was just meant to be a pep talk about giving it your all.  Needless to say, the practice was fun, and the coaching was amazing.  I like it when a coach stops a kid and talks them through what they are doing wrong , gives them tips and encouragement as to how to fix their mistakes.  The kids were very kind and encouraging, when a play didn't go exactly as planned, you always heard someone telling them to shake it off, it's ok.  My kid got an opportunity to try a new to her position, she felt a little awkward, but as I said.... raw talent.... lots of raw talent.  (I'm sure you are thinking, sure her kid is great..... no claims that she is great, just a good kid who has a ton of potential, and excited to see where it leads).

Still relatively new to the travel ball circuit we are still searching for that perfect place, one where the coach will encourage, challenge, and push our child.  The team where there is no drama, the girls are all friends, and they are dedicated to becoming better ball players, good students, and great people.  We hope that we have found that place, however time will tell.  Teams will soon be finalized and we will land somewhere..... will it be the perfect place, we sure hope so.  In the real world is there even such a perfect place?

We all want our children to be the star on a team, but is it really doing them any favors?  We don't want them to be the worst player on the team who is the one riding the bench every tournament while you sit in the stands hoping they get a little play time.  A team that will be enough of a challenge that your child is going to work to step up their game, a team where they are given opportunities to get better, to earn their time and their place.

So how do we make the right decision without screwing up or scarring our kids for life?

In the end, its just ball...... a chance to make lifelong friendships and learn some life lessons.  The days of driving across town to practice, the car that stinks of smelly cleats and is littered with takeout food bags, and packing the car for weekend tournaments will only last so long.  The children will one day lace up the cleats for the last time, and move on to bigger and better things......but hopefully they will have taken some great life lessons and gained some great friends in the process.  We are letting our child make the ultimate decision as to where she will play, and to what extent, the time and commitment will be hers, I will be the driver and the cheerleader from the stands.  This will be her life lesson......